In recent years, many of us have turned to AI language tools for everything from brainstorming ideas to proofreading and even tracking down research articles. These tools are undeniably useful, and it’s understandable that people worry about AI taking over many jobs—including those in mental health. For some roles, like writers or translators, that future may be closer than we think.

When I first tried an AI-powered “therapy chat,” I was curious and, for a while, even found it enjoyable. But as a therapist, I quickly realized there’s a depth to the therapeutic relationship that no algorithm can replicate. AI can offer information, but it can’t offer what truly heals: the human connection.

After years of education, mountains of debt, and the frustrations of licensure, many therapists believe that once they’ve earned their credentials, they’re ready to be the world’s best counselors. But that’s like thinking a gym membership alone will get you a perfect beach body. The degree and license are just the ticket in—the real work, the transformative work, happens in the room, with clients, session after session.

Three Things AI Can’t Replace

1. The Power of Presence and Self-Disclosure

One of the most profound gifts a therapist offers is authentic presence. Early in my career as a family therapist, I struggled with how much of myself to bring into sessions. Should I share personal stories? Should I remain a blank slate? Every colleague had a different answer.

I learned the hard way. Once, trying to relate to a teenage client’s celebrity crush, I shared my own adolescent crush on the “Noxzema girl” and how I had her poster on my locker wall. My client’s reaction? She gagged, covered her ears, and shouted, “That’s so gross!” It turns out, teens don’t want to imagine their middle-aged therapist as ever having crushes! From then on, I realized that with younger clients, less is more when it comes to self-disclosure. With adults, I found they sometimes wanted more personal stories than was therapeutically necessary. Over time, I developed my own rule: only disclose what is truly helpful to the client’s journey.

This delicate balance—knowing when and how to share—is learned only through real-world experience, reflection, and a willingness to be present and attuned to each unique person. No AI can replicate the intuition and empathy that come from these lived moments.

2. Unconditional Positive Regard

Carl Rogers called this “unconditional positive regard”—the unwavering acceptance and support of a client, no matter what they share. When working with young clients with significant behavioral challenges, I would tell them, “I’d work with Jeffrey Dahmer or Mr. Rogers if either needed me.” My job isn’t to judge, but to walk alongside you as you move from where you are to where you want to be.

This kind of nonjudgmental acceptance is rare in the world, and impossible to find in AI. The sense of being truly seen and valued by another human being is at the heart of healing.

3. Walking the Journey Together

Therapy isn’t about solving someone’s problems for them, but about being a companion as they navigate the complexities of their own life. I often told my clients, “You can tell me anything, but you don’t have to tell me everything.” In other words, you don’t owe me information—I’m not here to figure you out. I’m here to walk with you, wherever your journey leads.

AI may be good at giving answers or offering advice, but it can’t sit with you in silence, or share a knowing look, or simply be present as you find your own way through life’s dark forests.

The Enduring Value of Human Connection

As therapists, our value lies not in our knowledge or our degrees, but in the quality of the relationship we build with our clients. It’s our empathy, our acceptance, and our willingness to be present that make therapy a uniquely human endeavor. While AI will continue to evolve and may serve as a helpful tool, it cannot replace the healing power of genuine human connection.

Let’s remember: “In my early professional years I was asking the question: How can I treat, or cure, or change this person? Now I would phrase the question in this way: How can I provide a relationship which this person may use for his own personal growth?”
—Carl Rogers

It is through this relationship—rooted in acceptance, presence, and authentic connection—that true change becomes possible.